The Beat

As part of a quest "to get things named after me," Stephen Colbert had fans of his show, The Colbert Report, bombard the Saginaw ( Mich.) Spirit with e-mails suggesting that the Ontario Hockey League team name its mascot after the host. It worked. The team recently unveiled Steagle Colbeagle the Eagle, a bird whose resemblance to Colbert pretty much stops at his wire-rim glasses. After a videotaped introduction from Colbert, Steagle (left) took the ice and promptly tripped and fell. He also tumbled after the ceremonial puck drop. The Spirit won the game, however--its first victory of the year after four losses. During a show last week Colbert (below), in a Spirit jersey, delivered a rousing pep talk to the team. "You're not just playing for yourselves or the people of Saginaw anymore," he said. "You're playing for my personal glory." He wound up the speech with an impassioned plea to "win one for the Steagle."

After Trevor Hoffman began using AC/DC's Hells Bells as his intro music in 1998, the Padres closer met the band and presented them with San Diego jerseys. Last week he got something in return. Before Game 2 of the NLDS at Petco Park, Hoffman, who broke Lee Smith's career saves record last month, was presented with a Gibson guitar autographed by Angus Young, the band's guitarist. Hoffman also caught the ceremonial first pitch, which was delivered by Smith.

While Hoffman couldn't be happier with his theme song, one Minnesota Vikings fan is working to change his team's. Before kickoffs, Welcome to the Jungle blares at the Metrodome--which is 1,800 miles from the nearest jungle. So Andy Saur, 29, a graphic designer from Duluth, started a campaign for a more fitting tune: Led Zeppelin's Immigrant Song, which is about actual Vikings. "I thought it'd be cool, and more appropriate," says Saur, who has a petition at www.vikingskickoff.com. It only has 175 signatures, but Saur has been noticed. An Icelandic paper ran a story on him last month.

In July, Terrell Owens released an autobiography that former Eagles teammate Donovan McNabb--who was criticized in the opus--called "a children's book." One can only wonder what he'll think of T.O.'s latest literary foray, an actual children's book called Little T Learns to Share. Owens and his co-author, Courtney Parker, see the irony. "Terrell's never made a secret regarding his own childhood," Parker told the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. "He said maybe [he] should ... incorporate lessons [he] may not have gotten as a child." At least four more books are planned, including Little T Learns to Say I'm Sorry. No word on whether we'll see Little T Learns to Stop Talking.... Last week the Knicks and superfan Spike Lee switched roles: The players became the audience as Lee screened his Hurricane Katrina documentary When the Levees Brokeat the request of coach Isiah Thomas.